How Can I Raise My Self-Esteem? This is not an easy question with “simple” answers to give that are not so easy to incorporate into a mind that is used to being negative.
The first step to any change is to notice what needs to be changed. How often are you self-critical? Many people who have low self esteem report they constantly engage in negative self talk. It might be helpful to start writing down what your critical voice says to yourself. Does it sound like anyone you knew when you were a child? (hint hint..)
“Can’t you do anything right?”
“I can’t believe you just did that..what a moron!”
“How could you make such a stupid mistake?”
“What’s wrong with you? You’re not even trying!”
When you find you are putting yourself down STOP IT! Try to then replace that negative comment with a more positive one, i.e. “I am doing the best I can” or “I can do this!”
The more you can self praise you will see your self-confidence rise and you will start to value yourself more and more. Make a list of all of your positive attributes, strengths and things you like about yourself. Is this list longer than your list of negatives? Which do you focus on more? Give yourself permission to think positively about yourself. Write the list and then read it over and over again until some of it might sink in!
Finish this sentence many times a day…
I like myself because _________________________________________.
Stop Taking Things So Personally
Was the woman at the supermarket check out rude to you? Did you wonder what you possibly could have done to irritate her? How would it be to change that thought? Instead of trying to find the hidden personal meaning behind what she says, consider thinking, “She must’ve had a bad morning…”
Stop Letting Others Define You
How much do you care about what others think of you? If someone points out one fault of yours do you take it as a complete criticism of your whole self? If someone compliments you does it make your whole day? Of course it is okay to feel good when others notice something positive about you and get somewhat affected by a criticism, BUT, those comments do not need to define you. Instead let yourself be your own praiser with lots of positive self-talk.
Important Notice: The information presented above is provided for educational purposes only and is not a substitute for consulting a psychologist or other mental health professional to discuss your unique situation.